so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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