Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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