Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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