it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
