Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
operation have a gay friend backfired
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
