I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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