Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
he fucked my hip out of place.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
