State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
