Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
