There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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