happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I just gargled with NyQuil
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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