I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
