Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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