I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize