She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
