Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
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