im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
