And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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