Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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