i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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