We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Barsexuality is the new black.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
