my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
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