Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
