Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
