You're completely useless in the revolution.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Randomize
