Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize