It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
