I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize