lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I haven't been this sober since birth.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize