I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Randomize
