Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
