before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
