Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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