It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
