please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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