It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Screwed.edu
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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