If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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