I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
