Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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