Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
