8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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