i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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