we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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