I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
