Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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