So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
