this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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