You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
