omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
