no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
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